“Lucy, I’m home!” Sebastian called with a laugh that came naturally. 

“Bastian!” Jaxsen jumped up, the picture of excited, the biggest smile plastered to his tiny face, and ran full force toward him. Glad he didn’t have anything in his hands, Sebastian found himself with two arms full of eight-year-old boy. Sebastian hugged the child with as much enthusiasm as he was being hugged. In that moment he felt his broken heart mend, if only a small fraction.

“I missed you, Bastian,” Jaxsen said secret-like, a big smile splitting him ear to ear.

“I missed you, too, sweet boy,” he said as he carried Jaxsen the few steps into the living room and deposited him on the couch with loudly exaggerated crashing sounds. Jaxsen giggled in pure delight as he sat properly and leaned happily into Sebastian. Sebastian wrapped his arm around him pulling him a bit closer. “Did you have fun while I was gone?” he asked, glancing at Nizhoni with a huge smile. She smiled back with a light chuckle.

“He was a perfect angel. I had a lot of fun, Mr. Michaels. I hope we can do it again one day.”

Jaxsen blushed deeply when she kissed his cheek and smiled. “I hope so, too.”

Dinner was eaten and the dishes were set in the sink for later cleaning. Jaxsen leaned into Sebastian, his head resting in the hollow of his arm and shoulder and doing his best not to fall asleep. Sebastian smiled at his dogmatism and nonchalantly began playing with his hair. The boy had a long day and soon fell right to sleep. Nizhoni had stayed for dinner upon Jaxsen’s shyly asked request. She had smiled widely, accenting her high cheekbones, as she happily accepted the invitation. Her eyes were the color of dark chocolate and her skin only a few shades lighter than her Navajo heritage.

Jaxsen was enthralled by her intelligence and captivated by her profession. Space, stars, galaxies and the like were as much a passion as linguistics and history. So much so that when Jaxsen was placing the glow-in-the-dark star stickers on his walls and ceiling, he placed as many constellations in the correct order as the wall space allotted him. Sebastian smiled at the talkative side of the normally shy boy. 

Nizhoni was a theoretical astrophysicist and just as enchanted with Jaxsen as he was with her. After dinner was eaten and conversation died down to a stopping point, Sebastian lifted Jaxsen into his arms. The boy cracked his eyes open and smiled. 

“Time for bed, Jack. Say good night, sweet boy.”

“Okay, Bastian.” Sebastian put him down and he walked up to Nizhoni. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Nizhoni. I hope you will come over again soon.”

Nizhoni smiled and scooped him up in an enveloping embrace that he returned with equal exuberance. “I will do just that, Yanaha.”

Jaxsen blushed deeply and when Nizhoni kissed his cheek, he became almost purple and all but ran from the living room upstairs.  

“Do you want me to help you with the dishes?” Nizhoni asked as she followed him into the kitchen once he came back from tucking Jaxsen in bed. She crossed her arms and smiled as she leaned against the counter. 

Sebastian smiled and shook his head. “I don’t know why you ask, Zhoni. You know damn well that even if I say no you’d help anyway.”

She smiled at his childhood nickname for her. “Quite right you are, but I appreciate you always letting me ask, bich’aah naasha,” she said, hugging him from behind. “I miss you, Sebastian.” She stood tall at five-foot-ten, though not as tall as his six-foot-four, she was still able to rest her chin on his shoulder. Her breath sent tingles from where it brushed his skin. He wrapped his arms around his center where her arms circled him. 

“I miss you, too, Nizhoni.” He turned around and kissed her gently on the lips. She deepened the kiss before pulling away from him and checking her watch. 

“I’ve got to go, ya’at’eeh bich’aah naasha. Sorry I can’t stay later tonight, but soon.” She kissed him again, whispered her love and alone left him standing.

Sebastian bolted up out of bed before he knew what was happening. He stood there to the side of his bed and listened. Then he heard it again. The screaming coming from the room down the hall made his blood freeze. He burst into the boy’s room, Jaxsen’s name on his lips. He flipped the switch and the room lit up. Suddenly he had a frantic eight-year-old climbing into his arms. 

“What, Jack, what’s wrong? Baby boy, what’s the matter?” Jaxsen just clung to him and cried, completely as terrified as he seemed and way too upset to formulate words in response to Sebastian’s inquiries; he simply tightened his grip.

“Come on,” he said softly and switched off the light. He carried Jaxsen into his room and set him on the bed. Jaxsen instantly gripped his arm, wrapping both of his tiny arms around his one. He squeezed his eyes shut tight and buried his face into Sebastian’s shoulder. His cries had grown quieter, though the tears did not slow and the fear he felt did not lessen. Sebastian held onto him for several more minutes before prying his arm from Jaxsen’s grasp. Instantly the boy panicked.

“Easy, Jack, easy. Let’s just lie down, okay? You can sleep in here tonight. It’s alright, now, sweet boy. Let’s get under the covers and then I’ll hold you, okay?”

Eventually Jaxsen calmed and fell asleep cradled in Sebastian’s warmth, and basking in the safety he found within Sebastian himself. Sebastian lie awake for over an hour that night watching over his tiny charge before he lost the battle and fell asleep.

When Sebastian woke the next morning he found himself trapped underneath a solidly sleeping child. Jaxsen’s head was turned away and resting solely on his chest. His arm rested along Sebastian’s abdomen, clutching a petite handful of Sebastian’s shirt. Sebastian drew lazy patterns slowly along Jaxsen’s back before laying his hand flat. He felt the boy’s breathing and frowned. It was short and hitching. 

“Jaxsen?” The only response he received from the diminutive figure was him curling tighter around him and a stronger grip of shirt in his little hand. “Jack, sweet boy, what’s the matter? Come here.”

Sebastian pulled him up to where Jaxsen’s head was tucked underneath his chin easily and without protest. Jaxsen clung tightly to Sebastian and tried to control his emotions. It seemed, however, that the more he tried to reign them in, the more rampant they ran. Sebastian kissed his head and stroked his hair and spoke softly to him, which broke his resolve.

With a deep breath he plunged, “I had a bad d-dream o-of…about my mommy and daddy.”

“Oh, I see.” Sebastian kissed his hair again. 

“I saw it happen, Bastian. I saw them. They would have killed me, too, but he couldn’t find me. Mommy hid me away in the safe room, but I could still see.” He looked Sebastian in the eye and the raw pain in those azure eyes broke his heart. “I miss them, Bastian. I want them back, Bastian, I want them back!”

And the tears fell unbidden as Sebastian gathered the broken little boy more completely into his grasp, enfolding his arms around him. He held him, bracing him, embracing him, and holding tightly as together they rode out the storm. Jaxsen’s wails viciously yanked at Sebastian’s heartstrings as he called for Mommy and Daddy; as he begged Sebastian to bring them back to him.

When he found out about Glen and Sara Michaels’ untimely deaths, Sebastian felt his cardiovascular system fail, his blood ran cold and his airway compressed to a point where no oxygen could pull through. He had been glad he was alone when the devastation hit. However, when the shock wore off from the news, he began searching for Jaxsen Michaels; the only child of his dearest friends and his godson. He was angry he had not been contacted by New York social services until he knew the exact date of the murders. December 17, 2013. He knew that date well enough but for his own horrors. He had been two years deep in Bosnia. His last year in the service of his country. That last mission of Black Ops got a little too black and at end of all the bloodshed and in its finale, Sebastian Green opted out. He couldn’t blame himself for what happened to Jaxsen and could only try to teach him to grieve. Something he highly suspected the boy never was able to do. And he knew still these were not the last tears his shirt would soak up over this subject; just as he knew this would not be the last nightmare he soothed from the boy’s mind.

“Jaxsen, come here for a minute,” Sebastian called as he walked through the door. He wasn’t sure what kind of fight he was in for at the conclusion of this conversation, and admittedly he was nervous about how the boy would react to this news. Jaxsen came bounding down the stairs with the exuberance of any eight-year-old boy.

“What’s up, Bastian?” Sebastian set down his grocery bags on the kitchen table.

“Come here for a minute, I wanna talk to you for a bit.” Sebastian noticed the boy pale and smiled to reassure him. “Come sit with me,” Sebastian said as he sat down on the couch.

He was hesitant to join him on his usual side of the couch but did as he asked. “A-am I in trouble?”

Nizhoni, who had been watching Jaxsen while Sebastian went grocery shopping and run some errands, began automatically putting away the groceries quietly in the kitchen. She sighed sadly as she looked at the boy’s frightened expression. She knew that fear. She looked at Sebastian but his gaze was fixed on Jaxsen.

“No, Jack, you’re not in trouble, sweet boy. Nothing like that. While I was out today I registered you into the local elementary school. Summer is almost up and you need to be in school. You’ve been with me now for a little over five weeks and I feel that you’ve had enough time to settle in here and that you’re ready to go to school. What do you think?”

Jaxsen sat quietly staring at his hands that were folded limply in his lap. He sniffled and shrugged. His mind screamed at him to suck it up. Stop crying. Take it like a man! A mantra he’d heard so many times before. As his mind spiraled out of his grasp he lost any conception of reality; his thoughts ran away with whispered accusations trailing behind him. He jumped, a whimper escaping his lips, as he found himself being lifted into Sebastian’s arms. 

“What’s wrong, sweet boy?”

“Do I have to go, Bastian?”

Sebastian smiled lightly and rubbed his back up and down, flat-palmed. “You need to go to school, Jack.” He nodded and looked away, biting his lower lip. He said something that Sebastian didn’t catch. After some cajoling Jaxsen repeated his question. And then Sebastian at once understood the boy’s trepidation and hugged him close.

“Will you be here still when I get home?” There was a plea laced within that question Sebastian felt should never emerge from someone so young. 

“Oh, sweet boy.” He kissed his temple. “How about I make you a deal, okay?” Jaxsen nodded, his head resting against his chest, while Sebastian’s chin rested atop his head. “Now, I can’t do it every day, but how about I come and pick you up from school a few days a week?”

Jaxsen smiled though it didn’t reach his eyes. “I’d like that, Bastian. You promise you’ll pick me up?”

Sebastian smiled trying to keep the sadness from the expression. “I promise, Jack. How about I pick you up on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays? How’s that sound? I already talked to Nizhoni, and she can pick you up on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Okay?”

“How come you can’t pick me up every day?”

“Well, because during the school year I teach a writing class on those days and they run later than you’re in school.” Sebastian pushed a stray lock of blond hair behind the boy’s ear. “You won’t be left there, sweet boy.”