Running. He was running. He was aware of the bone deep chill he was drowning in. He couldn’t breathe. He wanted to scream for Sebastian-where was he? But he couldn’t scream. He was crying. He could feel the offending salt-water on his face. Suddenly a large, rough hand reached out, grabbing his arm in a vice-like grip before yanking him downward. The floor seemed to evanesce from under his feet. His toes tickled as the flooring seemed to pixelate before dematerializing altogether, and then found himself free falling at an ever increasing speed. And then he discovered he was able to scream.

Sebastian and Nizhoni exited the elevator onto the floor that housed Jaxsen. Sebastian kept his eyes on the floor, watching the fluorescent lighting reflect in the shine of the white and blue speckled floor tiles of the hospital floor. About half way down the hall a scream echoed that made Sebastian’s chest lurch and his legs move in quick, wide strides that matched somewhere between running and sprinting.

“Hey!” he bellowed as he burst into the private room. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing? Let him the fuck go.” In a flash Sebastian was beside the orderly who’d taken firm grip on Jaxsen’s flailing arms, pinning him to the bed. The man, who looked no older than his early twenties, let out a small shriek before swiftly backpedaling away from both frantic child and enraged father.

“Daddy!” Jaxsen screamed in a panic as he crawled to the side of the bed that Sebastian stood on. Scooping him from the bed, Sebastian attempted to soothe his crying son. That’s when he noticed the blood droplets standing out in a shiny crimson red before fading to a ruddy brown.

“Jack, let me look at you,” he said gently, trying to pull back from Jaxsen’s clasping grasp. He wailed his protest, tightening his grip around Sebastian’s neck. “Jaxsen, baby boy, you’re bleeding. Please let me see?” With hiccuping sobs Jaxsen sat back to allow his arm to be looked at. Quicksilver tears fell harder as he too caught sight of his arm. 

“Hush now. Let me see.” Nizhoni handed him a paper towel which he used to gently wipe the area.

“What do we have here?” someone said from the doorway. Sebastian turned half to the left to find the same doctor who had accosted him about Jaxsen’s condition a couple hours previous. Doctor Stiles came long beside Sebastian, smiling down at the obviously frightened child. “Hi there, Jaxsen. Seems to me like you’ve had quite an exciting day, huh? It looks like you’ve torn out your I.V. there. Can I take a look-see?”

Jaxsen shyly extended his arm and sat still as the small tear was disinfected and a Band-Aid placed over the little wound.

“There you go,” Doctor Stiles smiled warmly as he spoke, “good as new.” Jaxsen half grinned as he looked at the Sponge-Bob Square Pants Band-Aid. “Now what happened here for all this to occur?” Jaxsen raised his eyes to Sebastian, who nodded in turn. 

“I had a bad dream and I was scared and when I woke up someone was holding me down. He hurt my arm. And he scared me.” Jaxsen’s lower lip quivered and protruded.

“When I walked in he had him pinned and was holding him down by the upper arms. It wasn’t until I hollered that he let him go.” Sebastian ran his fingers through the boy’s hair, smoothing it back down. 

Dr. Stiles looked at Jaxsen. “How badly did he hurt you when he grabbed you?”

Jaxsen rubbed his eyes with a loosely balled fist. “Just a little bit.”

“Would you mind if I lifted up your sleeve to look at it? I’ll be very gentle.” Jaxsen nodded, his breath hitching in his throat. The doctor smiled at the boy.

“There we go. Can you move your arm okay?” Jaxsen demonstrated the agility of his arm. 

“Yep,” he said as he settled it against his chest. 

Stiles looked at Sebastian. “The nurse responsible told me Jaxsen here was having a nightmare and began to thrash around. Then grabbed his arm to prevent him ripping out the I.V., which he failed to do, I notice. I’m not making excuses, that’s just his side.”

“He scared me. I don’t like being restrained.” The pouty tone he adopted belied the sophistication of the indignant look on his face. Much like a monarch who experienced his very first life’s disappointment. Sebastian’s heart clenched and unconsciously tightened his grip around Jaxsen, as if to shield him from the disappointments and pain that haunted his cerulean eyes.

“I don’t blame you. I was never a fan of it, either.” Davis Stiles shared an intimate exchange with the boy that conveyed a message of empathetic understanding before standing back up. “There’s a bit of bruising on the upper arm. Nothing major. I am sorry, Mr. Green, and rest assured this matter won’t be taken lightly.”

Sebastian shook the man’s hand and they shared a look as well. Sebastian smiled in thanks and in sympathy. “Thank you, Dr. Stiles.”

“Daddy, I wanna go home. When can we go home?” His voice carried with it a whiny pout.

“If you don’t have a fever by lunch tomorrow, I’ll release you. But I want to keep you the night for observations. Deal?” Jaxsen did not like that response, but reluctantly nodded knowing there was not an option in the compromise. “That’s a good lad.” Dr. Stiles tousled Jaxsen’s blond hair. Sebastian felt a surge of undeniable pride when the only reaction he had was an impish grin.  

Throughout the entire ordeal Sebastian had been aware of both Nizhoni and his mother’s presence in the background as they tried to stay out of the way. When the room was clear of all medical personnel, Rose looked to Sebastian, whose eyes were dark with stress and anger.

“Sebastian, I only stepped out a moment. I just went for a cup of coffee.” There was apology and regret in her voice.

“We’ll discuss it later, Mom.” His tone was icy as the water Jaxsen became submerged in. Rose sighed knowing arguing her side now would only be counter-productive to her cause. She nodded once, her lips compressing into a thin line.

“Daddy?” Sebastian swiveled his head till his eyes met with Jaxsen’s.

“What, sweet boy?”

With a pleading expression on his face Jaxsen brokenly said, “Don’t be mad at Gramma Rose. Please, Daddy.” Sebastian's face softened and he kissed the boy’s forehead.

“Okay, Jack.”

“Promise?”

He smiled softly at the innocence that did still remain in the child. “I promise, sweet boy.” Sebastian kissed his forehead again. “Come on, Jack, lie back down. You need your sleep. You’ve had a pretty exciting day, huh?” Jaxsen leaned heavily onto him, snuggling deeply into his chest, right thumb finding its way to his mouth, closed his eyes and fell asleep. Sebastian smiled, a light rumble of amusement echoing in his chest. Message received loud and clear.

“Sebastian, are you going to stay?” Nizhoni asked, already knowing the answer.

“Yeah. I don’t want to leave him.” His words were softly spoken, but the fleeting glare he pointed in his mother’s direction communicated more than any words spoken later ever would. Nizhoni sighed, a whistle emanating from her flared nostrils.

Disregarding Sebastian’s misplaced anger at Rose for the time being, Nizhoni kissed his lips, hard, conveying her own silent message. 

“How about a cup, or three, of some coffee?” Nizhoni suggested as they trudged into the living room once arriving back at home.

“No, I don’t think so, dear. I think I’m going to turn in for the night.” She sounded tired, but not from a lack of sleep.

“Mom.” Rose’s eyes snapped to Nizhoni, the name making her stop in her tracks. It was rare that the younger woman called her ‘Mom.’ It was a name she’d bestowed upon the older woman many years ago, and it made Rose’s heart clench with maternal adoration just as much now as it did when she was a child. “Have some coffee with me, please. It’s been a long, extremely emotional day and I could really use your company.” Rose looked down, lids lowered away from the piercing ebony depths, and breathed once, twice, and again.

She raised her head, which had dropped when she lowered her eyes, and smiled. “Make it a strong tea and tot of whiskey, you’ve got yourself a deal.” Nizhoni smiled and her shoulders relaxed slightly.

They sat at the kitchen table, the light over the sink the only illumination for them to see. They sat quietly as they sipped their steaming beverage. Holding the cup with both hands Rose tried to warm the chill inside her heart like the whiskey warmed her belly.

“He’s not really angry at you. You know that don’t you?” Nizhoni asked into the white coffee mug nestled gingerly between her palms. Rose did not respond, but took another sip of her tea and sighed. She’d made the drink stronger in whiskey than in tea and she felt the calming lull spread through her bloodstream.

“I don’t know what to think anymore, Nizhoni. He’s…changed…” She paused on a mournful sigh, sipped her drink to swallow the threatening lump lodged in her throat. “Since Daniel died…I was hoping coming here with Jaxsen would maybe…I don’t know…remind him that…” She faltered, her words failing to materialize in her mind’s eye to accurately articulate the feelings she deficiently tried to convey.

“He has changed. We’ve all changed. Danny was a great kid and he took a part of all of us with him. Jaxsen…Jaxsen is a special kid. He’s got heart and spirit and they’re slowly healing each other.” She took a long drink before getting up for a refill, thought better of the tea, grabbed the bottle of Midleton Irish Whiskey, took a long drink straight from the bottle, and returned with it to the table. 

“When we came back here,” Nizhoni began again and passed the bottle of forty-year-old whiskey to Rose. She poured slowly as she listened. “Mom, he…collapsed. What took so long to get back was that he came completely undone. He even passed out because of how upset he was. He fucking hyperventilated. He thought Jaxsen was going to die in his arms like Daniel did.” Nizhoni paused, watching Rose for a moment wondering if she should speak further. “I…don’t know how much you know about the year or so after Danny’s accident,” she began meeting Rose’s gaze directly, “but I forced him to move in with me, which I think you know already. But I don’t know if you know why. It was bad before but it got really bad especially after Ellie left, and…many nights, and many days if I’m honest, I had him on suicide watch between myself and a couple close friends.” Rose said nothing, but her gray-blue eyes echoed a pain that will never leave her. 

“I took precaution,” Nizhoni continued. “I had to…but a small part of me believed, and still does, he wouldn’t have done it. But I can say right now beyond a shadow of a doubt if Jaxsen had…” She choked on the words, taking another drink to dispel the words’ foul taste and continued. “I don’t think I, or any other force, would have been able to stop him. And he knows it. And he’s scared.”

Rose nodded and in a parrot-like fashion, drank long, like Nizhoni, from the bottle.